I Am Broken But I Have Christ!
If I were to ask you your definition of brokenness, would you have an answer? Many people would stumble over a bunch of adjectives to explain. I am sorry to tell you that I can't give you a solid answer either. I think it is one of those things that you only really know, once you have experienced it.
If you have been broken or severely humbled, you know what I am talking about. Trust me, if you have not experienced it, you will! Sometimes we are broken, and everyone around us knows it, but we are clueless. There are also times when there is no guessing needed. Brokenness will visit us at some point because we are sinful and we live in a sinful world that affects us.
Okay, we see it, but now what do we do to fix it? One of the answers God has revealed to me in my seasons is not to try to fix myself. How can a weak and wounded person fix their self? Really, it doesn't make much sense, yet we struggle and we strive with no success. We cannot fix ourselves, so go ahead and give up trying.
Is This From God?
This could be for your sanctification? He humbles for a reason. Trying to stop that -trying to fix yourself- to escape the pain of humility is pride. Maybe God is testing you. Do you love Him for Himself, even with whatever is hurting you? For me, it was a sickness for over a year. I mean having to be carried from room to room, doctor visits, frustration- stuff like that.
Whatever it is for you, If nothing ever changed, could you be okay with that? Can you be satisfied with Him alone? That is a question you should ponder. He is a good Father, so He doesn't leave us on our own. He is with us, even right now. Here are a few things to consider, and I hope they will encourage you.
1. Cry
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.
Psalm 34:17-20
Yes, you did read correctly. I said cry. God tells us if we cry, He will help. It is the way we cry that matters. We are not crying to the four walls around us, we are not crying to people (to fix us), though going to a friend for encouragement is very healthy. David cried, and His crying was pleasing to the Lord because he was crying out to God. Did you catch the rest of the verse?
It says, and the Lord hears and delivers. That is our hope.He is listening to your cry and He will deliver you from your troubles. You may feel like you are too messy for others to deal with. It may seem that you have a lot, possibly too much- in your eyes- to tell a friend, without them pushing you away, with your baggage. This is never the case with God.
Thankfully! Psalm 50:15 says, "And call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify me.” How does crying glorify God? Crying out to Him not only releases emotions, which is a gift from God, but it also shows true humility and desperation for Him. When God does come with deliverance, with a true sense of His presence, all Glory will go to Him. There will be a praise on your lips that could only happen after a season of severe humbling.
2. Be Honest
To you, O Lord, I call; my rock, be not deaf to me, lest, if you be silent to me, I become like those who go down to the pit. Hear the voice of my pleas for mercy, when I cry to you for help, when I lift up my hands toward your most holy sanctuary.
Psalm 28:1-2
One of the things I love about the Psalms is how honest David was with the Lord. That is an and example for us. We can give our experiences of being a total wreck to Him. What is the sense in pretending before Him? We ought, to be honest with Him. God has given us so many blessing. Beautiful nature, the harmony of a skillfully created song. Food, that is delicious. Family, laughter...the list goes on and on.
But we also live on a battlefield, with an enemy who's aim is to destroy us and to steal glory from our King. When feeling beat up, sore and defeated where do we turn? Are we honest, or do we put on a smile and act like our lives are not falling into pieces? What to do when we are so helpless and we see the enemy strong and ready? We don't try to fight, we go tell our Captain. He has never lost a battle.
He didn't tell us this path would be easy. Remember Christ? Our Savior? The One who carried the cross and was hung on it for us. I think Christ meant it when He told us to take up our cross and follow Him. But, still, honesty with God is not a sin. We can go to our Captain, show Him our wounds, and He will fight for us.
3. Trust
Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
Psalm 46:10
You have surrendered, cried out to him, and shared with Him honestly, We must then trust. He tells us to be still and know He is God. He is God! We have no reason to fear in our brokenness. Now, from experience, emotional and spiritual surgery isn't fun. Actually, sometimes it feels like you'd rather stay unhealed. However, He is perfect, loving and gentle, even with a surgeon's knife. His aim is not to harm you. It is to make you like His Son.
There were times when I felt like a heavy cloud of darkness was surrounding me, with no light in sight. But God is faithful, He always came for me. The encouragement He gave was never turned inward toward me. He always pointed by eyes to the One who called Himself the Light and the Way. There is nothing good in you that will cause you to be glad. Looking inward will most likely cause despair and depression. Put your trust in Him. He has not forgotten you and will not forsake those who seek.
Bring The Pieces
Jesus wants us to come with all of these broken pieces. Some of us have a lot of them, some only fractured into bits here or there. In any case, He tells us to go to the great Physician who is the only One capable of healing us. Lifting tearful eyes to our sovereign King, our loving Father, our faithful Shepherd, that is the answer. Whatever your brokenness is? It could be a number of things. Bring those broken pieces to Him and allow Him to bind you with His endless love.
Wherever He may guide me,
No want shall turn me back;
My Shepherd is beside me
And nothing can I lack;
His wisdom ever waketh
His sight is never dim,
He knows the way He taketh,
And I will walk with Him.